He-motions

Sorry guys I am in bit of a somber mood today so I am going to vent. Hopefully an idea will materialize from my ramblings.

Ever hear this story: "Young mother throws baby out of window" or "Man beat daughter's mother up in a domestic violence."

Usually, at least for me, when hearing those stories I would become disgusted. "How could someone do that?" What could it have been THAT bad you want to throw a baby out or hit someone in the face with a bat? Life has since took a pair of rusty needle nose pliers and snatched open my eyelids. Case in point.....

Average joe works hard. He has avoided drugs, alcohol and jail by doing what he was told to do and believing that life will give him what he deserves. He graduates, he finds a job and he has a car. Great? huh? Enter beautiful woman: now the scenario is really complete. Good girlfriend, possibly marriage life is sweeet! Life is a bitch. Be clear.

So apparently average joe buys her a ring and does what he can for their dream wedding. They are married, she becomes pregnant. Joe jr is a bundle of joy. Everything is good. Joe loses his job. All of a sudden when things are a little tight Ms. Joe is angry; her life style has become a little stretched. Joe is still a good guy and works hard. He isn't finding a job fast enough and the baby is constantly crying. Joe argues with his perfect wife. He still sacrifices to get her whatever she wants, she is still beautiful. They still argue. He becomes a "worthless piece of shit" who can't do for him or the baby. Woah! When did this happen?

Joe then finds out she has been having sex in his house with someone else. Apparently joe wasn't satisfying her? Joe comes home to find divorce papers on his kitchen table and a letter stating he needs to leave the house he bought. He doesn't see Joe. jr and after a week of not living there walks into the kitchen after picking up mail to see her young lover making breakfast for his sexual temptress who is still upstairs sleeping.......

What would you do? Bat to the face? Walk away? Send a scathing letter to match.com for giving Joe an undercover whore?

Second scenario....

Young girl is dating. Things are fine. She is in school and has had a great time. Loves her boyfriend. Mother and family support her. She is having sex. She is partying. She is enjoying college life. Ooops! Condom breaks. No biggie this is what clinic's are for: there is a medical complication she didn't anticipate. She realizes aborting the baby my cause another issue that is life threatening. Boyfriend loves her...but fatherhood isn't in the 4 year plan.

Motherhood happens. School stops. It is alright though, countless other women have gone through and dealt with this issue. She is strong enough to as well. Boyfriend said he will support. But they are both jobless and with no degree. She drops out. She won't burden him. She'll come back to school a few months after the baby is born. Pregnancy is tough alone. She is a mommy. She loves her child. She comes home......then the crying starts. She gets email about spring break, she can't go. She looks at her dresses. She can't fit them. She sees stretch marks. The baby will not stop crying. Her parents don't approve and offer little help. Only one friend really stops by. The others are out partying, drinking, having sex, being her 10 months ago. The baby keeps crying.
Pampers are expensive. So is rent. Can't afford food this week AND a crib. The baby will sleep with her. How do you sleep with a newborn in the bed......where is the chapter on that?
The crying keeps her up all night. She screams now. It doesn't stop. School called and bursar wants money. Her degree is on the line. Where did her future go? The baby WILL NOT STOP SCREAMING......

what do you do? Walk away? What if you have done that 3 times already...the baby is super small....helpless....and the window is open. Her life is right outside that window......what would you do?

Sorry to be so morbid but each scenario is real. They happen everyday. And everyday people try to deal with them. Aforementioned with the girl and child I wrote about because I think that is the only example of a woman letting her emotions get the best of her that is looked down upon. In almost any other instance, people push the blame away from her. Motherhood, the proverbial rite of every woman is something they innately should just KNOW how to handle. And handle well, it is in their DNA after all! And if they don't know how to handle it then there is something completely off with their make up. They fucked up somewhere and didn't tell anybody.

As far as Joe.....well he is a man. And he should not have hit that woman in the face with a bat! He should have better control over his emotions! Right? He is a man and he is stronger than a woman, who is vulnerable. He should have known better! How dare her trust her so blindly! Believe in life to completely!

Now I don't want to turn anyone off to the blissful joys of marriage or children. I am just trying to clearly make a point about emotions and life situations. Sometimes things will happen to you that will seem completely unbearable. Un-reasonable or un-believable. And as a man or rather a person if you aren't all there emotionally it can drive you to become another person completely or do things which are out of character. In each case I just described no one seemed crazy or violent. They just got pushed to the point where they saw their only option was to lash out . You got work on the inside as well as the outside when you develop as a person and a man.

Many times we (as men) are taught emotions are for wimps. That is false. We have them. And in some regards they run deeper than woman's because we aren't taught ways to express them. If someone isn't emotionally stable and they are put in either situation it could be volcanic. And would you blame them? Are you any better? It is hard to imagine unless you put yourself in their shoes. Know what it feels like to really be at your wits end........

If you are emotionally sound to the point you think you could handle either situation better, then consider yourself lucky and blessed. But remember a lot of people aren't that lucky. Everybody can have children and get married. I don't believe everyone can handle it the way they think they can. Know yourself. Know your limitations. And know the limitations of others.

Now when you hear those stories...........pray for those people......

[can you tell im going to talk about spirituality in my next blog? LMAO]